I think I cracked the code. I think I know why I have panic attacks. Whenever I have a panic attack, most times I cover my ears to block out the noise around me, but most times there is no noise around me, at least not at the rate to trigger a panic attack. So then I thought, "Why do I cover my ears if there's no noise to block out?". And now I found the reason. The noise isn't coming from the outside, it's coming from the inside. And by that I mean my nonstop racing thoughts. So, I think that's what causes my panic attacks. I'm gonna talk to my therapist about it in our next session.
Fear - a poem
So, this is a poem I wrote on 9.8.23 (a day after CORPE's birthday! Happy birthday CORPSE🥳🥳!!!). Fear Fear, It keeps drumming in your ear, Just don't shed a single tear, So they don't see, So they don't hear, It takes control over your life, Don't do this, No don't do that, It's much harder than I thought, Oh, for how long have I fought, Over on a losing team, There's no fog, No there's just steam, Oh the fear, It won't die down, It just sits there with it's crown, On it's thron on top a hill, It's just waiting for it's kill, Though for how long will I fear, Oh the timeline isn't clear.
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